The One Where I'm Rapunzel

“Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michaelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.”

H. Jackson Brown Jr.

Here I am at the threshold. In a short while, Big Sister will start Second Grade, Little Sister will start Pre-School, and I'll be a year older.

Wow. Where did time go? Just yesterday I was hyperventilating marveling at the fact that I was now responsible for a little person staring at me with big black eyes. I got caught up in motherhood, the daily grind, the world of the domestic goddess. 

As another addition came into the family I downgraded to survival mode. Like Bear Grylls, walking down the stairs every morning I was parachuted into an environment full of unknowns. The days were full of adventure, sometimes danger--plenty of tears and laughter along the way. Someone might have even eaten a lizard . . . .I jest.

Now they'll both be in school. I'll have . . . . . . . .free time. Seriously! For someone whose family does not live nearby, this is a BIG deal. Children really define oneself during the first years of their lives. Ok, I exaggerate, but I know that for a lot of people it's hard to see past the images of crumbs, sticky fingers and potty tales that come to mind when I say I don't work outside the home. (Hmmmm . . .she doesn't look like she spends her days in a sweet (how the French mispronounce say sweatshirt)).

Standing in this place, my mind is flooded with both giddiness and apprehension. A bit like Rapunzel in Tangled when she first steps onto the grass. Will what I have planned work? Of course it will. Maybe. Will I have the time to do it all? No! Yes!  Am I crazy?

I've already been asked multiple times : So you're going back to work, right?  
Bien sûr, because if you're not a mom you're a career woman. Part of me wants to say : no, actually I'm going to become a regular at the nearby spa and finish walking every inch of Paris while rating the local cafés and macarons . . . . 

Only time will tell.